Maybe the girls back at the sorority house think your klutziness is soooo adorable, but I don’t consider myself lucky that the drink you dumped in my lap was “just ice water!” The polite thing to do is offer to buy a drink for the person…or maybe hand her a freaking napkin. Go back to the Delta Chi house and give some thick-necked loser a handy and leave me alone. This is my new favorite bar and I will not allow it to become a mecca for your type. Shh, no. Stop talking. Leave.