You were told there would be no math involved? Tough. My weekend in a series of lists and tallies. Enjoy.
Boys kissed: I don’t know…maybe 5?
Oh, did you mean straight boys?: Unless we’re counting Dave and Matthew, that would be 0.
Boys stopping me in Safeway to tell me I look good: Just 1, but he was cute and his friend wasn’t exactly disagreeing.
Asses slapped: I lost count at 6. John, where’s my $10?
Times Dave’s version of Drunk Lecherous Dude at Party made me laugh: Haven’t stopped yet.
New black boots (!) complimented: Every time I turned around, bitches.