You know in movies where the storyline involves some sort of ugly-duckling-makover montage and we see the girl start out with frizzy hair and glasses and dorky clothes and then she comes down the stairs or the stylist spins the chair around and POOF! she’s gorgeous? I am totally That Girl right now!
Only, I’m still in the frizzy hair and glasses and dorky clothes stage. I have an afternoon of beauty all lined up (cut and color, eyebrow waxing, and pedicure, holla) so other than showering, I have put zero effort into any grooming whatsoever. Because why bother when a team of professionals will be undoing anything I did and fussing over me and making me look – let’s be honest – way better than I do when left to my own devices? Plus, I am a sucker for those makeover montages. Extra bonus points for ones that involve a shopping spree.
In other Beauty News, I have suddenly developed a weird interest/obsession with bronzer. Not Snooki-style or anything. Just Jergens Natural Glow stuff. I am the whitest person ever so you’d think this would be something I’ve been into since birth, but for the most part I’ve just embraced the pale. Or at least accepted it. I mean, who do I think I’m kidding, right? People who know me will not think that I a.) acquired any sort of pigment naturally or b.) suddenly jetted off to Hawaii and came back all sun-kissed. Sure, I’d use a little bronzer on my cheeks here and there, and I tried some self-tanner lotions on my legs AND there was one encounter with the Mystic Tan booth (where I was so panicked that I’d end up looking like Ross Gellar that I made Lili stand outside the door for moral support and to scream “TURN AROUND NOW!”) but it’s not something I invest a lot of time and energy into.
Why? Boredom? A sad attempt to will spring or summer to make an appearance FOR THE LOVE OF GOD? A seasonal urge to switch things up? The fact that I will be wearing a dress on Sunday and showing my legs for the first time in months? Who knows. I am an enigma wrapped in a mystery.