Pop Quiz, Hot Shot:
You are at the grocery store with your husband when lo and behold: you run smack into a guy you used to date*, who is also with a (presumably) significant other. You make eye contact and there is a simultaneous flicker of recognition. Do you
a.) Grab your yogurts and move on to the next aisle, acting like you don’t recognize him.
b.) Awkwardly smile and give him a weird head nod of acknowledgement while slowly dying on the inside because Emily Post doesn’t cover this shit.
c.) Option b, while hissing at your husband to “Hurry up already” so you can get ahead of them and not go down every aisle together for the love of Jesus.
d.) Options b & c, while telling your husband to QUIT STARING AT THEM, SERIOUSLY. Also, note that the guy’s hairline has really taken a hit in the last couple of years. Damn.
As you can see, I’m clearly an adult who can handle vaguely odd interactions with people I knew years ago. Good to know that I never lost my youthful inability to function in society among other humans.
*Dated briefly, no big falling out or conflict, just wasn’t going to be a thing.
Is This Thing On? 