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I feel like all I’ve written about lately is either my dad (who continues to improve by leaps and bounds each day) or wedding plans/stress (eight days away, people).  How exciting for everyone!  Even I am bored with myself.

Anything you’d like to see me report on?  A product review?  Anything?  Anyone?  Bueller?  Hit me with your best shot. 

In other news, today is my niece* Madison’s 13th birthday.  She is one of my favorite people on the planet and I hope she has an amazing birthday.  I also hope her teenage years don’t make her parents crazy, although if you believe in karma…  Aunt Christmas loves you to the moon and back, Sweet Girl!  Happy Birthday!

*I refer to her (and her sister) as my niece, although we are not technically related.  Her mom is one of my best friends in the world, and she has always referred to me as her auntie.

Our Normal

So, my dad had his surgery.  The procedure is called an anterior cervical discectomy and fusion and apparently it went beautifully.  I am finally breathing again and not quite the anxious walking disaster I was a few days ago.  The surgeon told Judy that everything looked good, and that they were able to clear out some bone spurs and basically, there IS hope for recovery.  There’s always the risk of further injury during an ACDF, but luckily there’s no sign of that now.  He already has some feeling back and is in pain, which in this case, is a happy thing.  His throat hurts like a bitch (they had to move his esophagus to the side in order to perform the procedure) and he’s not a fan of anesthesia, but he already sounds more hopeful and positive than he has in weeks.  Time will tell as far as what he actually regains and it will be a long, slow process but any improvement is welcome.

They called me up to let me know he is being moved to a rehab facility in Vallejo.  The same one where he was 28 years ago when he first broke his neck.  Again, this is a good thing: he is ready to be up and about instead of just lying in bed.

Dad: “So, you remember how to get there, right?  The place in Vallejo?”

Me: “Uhh…”

Dad: “You know, you’ve been there a bunch of times.”

Me: “Yeah, Dad, 28 years ago.  I am a little fuzzy on exactly where it is, seeing as how I was four and Mom would have me sleep on the way there since it was a long drive.  So, I might consult Mapquest instead of relying on my memory.”

You might think this lack of logical reasoning means my dad is losing it or is doped up and unaware of what he’s actually saying, but I can assure you, this is him.  Back to normal.

It’s nice.

So Far So Close

My wedding is just over two weeks away.  In some ways it feels like we decided to get married 10 years ago, and sometimes I swear it was 10 minutes ago. 

Every day continues to be a whirlwind of finalizing plans, tracking down wayward response cards (turns out it’s pretty hard to plan a formal seated meal when your extended family cannot be bothered to let you know if they plan to attend or not), fielding vendor questions, quelling my mother’s concerns over Lord-knows-what-today, and then at the end of the day trying to talk to Ed about something that is Not Wedding Related.  I may actually get interested in football for the first time in my life simply as a distraction.

And then there’s my Dad.  He is, as of this moment, scheduled for surgery this Wednesday.  He is also determined to walk (or roll) his favorite daughter down the aisle and his surgeons are confident he will be able to do so.  As for other small matters like feeding himself, driving, writing and the like?   Time will tell.

I waffle between being happier than I have ever been in my life and more scared than I have been since my dad’s accident 28 years ago.  (It occurred to me recently that Bubba is the exact same age now as I was when Dad broke his neck.  Sort of a weird coincidence, no?)  I feel borderline crazy some days with the ups and downs.  I am trying to focus on the good stuff as my Dad wants me to, but it also feels so frivolous?  Superficial?  To be chatting about flowers and wine lists when there is bigger stuff going on at the moment.

As for Dad, he is doing his best to meet his obligations and keep Bubba’s routine in tact.  They take the bus anywhere too far to walk, which suits my brother just fine.  That kid loves trains, buses, BART, planes, etc.  He loves taking new routes and watching people, even if it takes longer to get to swim lessons or a friend’s house.  Dad called the other day to tell me they rode the bus and then BART to explore downtown San Francisco.  Bubba expressed an interest in looking at skyscrapers, so off they went on a little adventure together.

We’re both riddled with guilt over what we’re NOT doing at the moment.  He wants to help his daughter with her wedding plans.  I want to help my father with…anything he needs. 

When we were in the early stages of planning the wedding and everything was hectic and there were a million decisions to be made and all of our parents were chiming in with opinions and requests I’d say to Ed that it would all be so much simpler if our families weren’t there.  Now the idea that part of my family could miss it breaks my heart.  Here’s hoping that is never an issue.

Thank You For Being a Friend

Sorry for the leaving the uber-Debbie Downer post up for so long.  Life has not slowed down one bit since I hit publish on that little pity party, and it seems like every day has been – to use a lame cliche – a roller coaster.  I’ve regaled you with the downs, so let’s focus on the ups, shall we?

My beautiful, funny, gracious, generous maids of honor threw me the loveliest wedding shower (and drunkest bachelorette party) ever in the history of parties.  These chicks make Martha Stewart look like…well, look like someone super-tacky.  My one regret is that I didn’t slow down enough to take pictures of it all.  Judy nicely offered to take photos as I opened gifts, but those are all horribly unflattering double-chin shots of me struggling with wrapping paper because I am an idiot.  And was also possibly tipsy off Kir Royales.

This gathering could not have come at a better time.  I needed to be with people who know and understand me.  The gifts were a bonus – beautiful bonuses – but being in a room with these women who mean so much to me just blew me away.  This time has been so hectic and while I can’t wait for the wedding day, I’m trying to slow down enough to really appreciate the moments leading up to it and count my blessings in the midst of the chaos.

How could I be anything but happy when sitting across from these ladies?

 

See? Don't we look like we're having fun?